Depression in the Media – ‘Reasons to stay alive’

‘Reasons to Stay Alive’ is a fairly new book by author Matt Haig. It details his experiences with depression and anxiety, and the ways in which he managed to overcome these issues.

Unlike a lot of books about depression, this book is actually very uplifting, focusing primarily on his recovery. It begins with the author describing his lowest point – his attempted suicide – and then proceeds to follow his progress on his way to recovery, detailing the things which have kept him alive.

This book resonated strongly with me, having suffered with depression throughout the last few years, and having been suicidal myself. At times, the book was difficult to read, as it brought back a lot of memories of being suicidal. However, the book is filled with scenes of hope and the realisation that depression will eventually lift, and that we simply have to struggle our way through it – there is ultimately a light at the end of the tunnel.

The book is written in a variety of formats, making it a very interesting read. Parts of it are written as lists, other parts written as an autobiography, and other parts written as an informative insight into the causes and diagnostic criteria of depression.

This book details many strategies and techniques to helping overcome depression, from simple meditation exercises to cognitive behavioural therapy approaches, making it a helpful read if you are experiencing depression and/or anxiety,

Overall, this was a fantastic read, full of hope and inspiration, and I would highly recommend it to anyone who has either struggled with/struggling with depression, or even for those who know someone with depression. You won’t be disappointed!

Creating personal goals

It’s been a while since I wrote my last blog post, so I realise this is long overdue. I’ve just been busy lately, now that I’m back at school.

On the one hand, I appreciate the structure that school gives me – I’m the sort of person who gets bored easily, so I need to keep myself busy or I start to feel restless – however, it does bring new problems for me. For example, being in part time (I’m only in to finish an A level now) makes me paranoid about arriving too early or too late, and after spending a while around only a few people, the crowds at school suddenly seem all the more terrifying. That being said, I am glad to be back around people.

Since I’m only in part time this year, my friends from last year have finished school already, so I’ve had the opportunity to make new friends. In a way, I think it’s the push I needed to challenge myself, so I think it’s a positive step.

Last week I attended the first session of a local anxiety course. For many people, this type of course would probably be very helpful, but for me, it just triggered further anxiety. I was surrounded by around 20 people I’d never met before (not good if you have social anxiety) in an unfamiliar setting. Also, the course felt more like a lesson, rather than providing guidance on how to implement the techniques into everyday life. It made me realise that there seems to be a lack of resources for people who experience social anxiety to access, without causing greater anxiety in the first place, which I think is an issue which needs to be addressed.

Personally, I prefer one-to-one therapy, as it gives you the opportunity to discuss issues which are personal or perhaps specific to you. Also, I find this type of situation less confrontational than sharing personal views with a large group of strangers.

Anyway, I’m choosing to see it as a positive that I pushed myself to try something new, which at least gave me the confidence that I can do these things if I try. At the moment, I’m just focusing on moving forward step by step, and hopefully eventually I’ll find a technique which works to cope with my anxiety.

I hope that this will also remind you that it doesn’t matter if you get immediate results – just focus on the small victories you achieve, and you’ll get there in the end!

Have a great week 🙂

Dealing with new situations

A common issue for people with aspergers is the difficulty we have with adapting to change and new situations. In fact, I don’t think there’s anybody who actually enjoys change and unfamiliarity. We just have to find ways to cope with the situation at hand.

Recently, I went on holiday to Florida, to visit Disneyworld. As excited as I was by this, as I am completely obsessed with all things Disney (the idea of spending 2 weeks surrounded by it was my idea of heaven), it was also terrifying. Part of my aspergers means I find any sort of change (even an item being moved to a different place in my room!) horrifying. Therefore, the realisation that I’d be away from the safety of my own home for 2 weeks made me feel incredibly anxious…

Not only was it the first time I had left Europe, but I was also aware of the fact that Disneyworld is one of the busiest places it visit in the middle of summer. Great – crowds as well, just to add more stress.

Somehow, though, I did manage to survive the experience. The main tactic I used to reduce my anxiety was distraction. If I was busy talking to someone, or watching films on the plane, my anxiety dropped to a minimum.

This isn’t to say it was a walk in the park, though. I was incredibly tense the first couple of days, planning out every activity for the day on a strict schedule. Rushing around everywhere doesn’t exactly make for the most enjoyable experience however, so after that we began to relax. I realised that it didn’t matter if we took our time with things, because there was plenty of time, and it was better to just enjoy the experience. We stuck to a basic schedule, for my own peace of mind, but I learnt to be much more flexible with it, and not to focus entirely on sticking to a schedule.

Regarding the crowds, this was somewhat harder to control. I couldn’t just make my anxiety disappear, and I would often end up expressing my fears by snapping at my family. The only way to deal with my anxiety was to stay near my parents, and ask them for reassurance when I was getting nervous. When my anxiety really built though, I had to just search for a quieter place to stop and calm my breathing.

Despite having some issues, though, the experience was incredible and I wouldn’t change it for the world. I was able to push myself to try new experiences, regardless of how scary they seemed at the time, and I began to see that they weren’t usually as terrifying as they’d seemed.

Sometimes, we have to take risks in order to really experience life. There’s no point in sitting around and letting our anxieties beat us, otherwise we will never overcome our fears. Push yourself, and you may just surprise yourself – maybe you can do it after all!